For the past eight months, my colleagues and I have been reporting on how best to age in place. We’ve done deep dives into the best gear to adapt a home for aging, gathered advice on how to protect older adults from scammers, and talked to caregivers across the country about how they stay organized — all with the goal of mitigating the risks of growing old in your own home. But we also set out to tell the stories of individual families, because at the center of aging in place is an immense amount of humanity, family, and sacrifice. When I finish a story, I like to feel that I’ve done a good job. But for the piece I reported for this package — on the complicated family dynamics of three siblings navigating the responsibilities of caregiving — the family in the story did all the good work for me. Lori Keenan and Susan and Nick Fontana are siblings in their 60s who are caring for their mom, Ann. Of the dozen-plus people who offered me their families’ stories, their experiences most fully embodied the challenges faced by the so-called sandwich generation: adults caught between raising their children, caring for their aging parents, and planning for their own later years. READ THE FEATURE She lost her husband. Then, her eyesight. Her adult children faced the question: What’s next?→ Caring for their mom is an act of love — they are returning the love and care she gave them as children, as Susan put it — but it is not easy. The workload is unevenly shared, the “right thing to do” is rarely clear-cut, and the emotional toll is constant. Each of them gave me hours of their time, and answered scores of deeply personal questions, in the hope that their experiences will help other families facing the same difficult situation. It takes courage and generosity of spirit to do that, especially with the openness and honesty that they displayed. There’s a fourth family member I want to acknowledge. Carolyn Fontana, Nick’s wife, has been an equal partner in caring for Ann for the last nine years; Nick calls her “the rock.” She and I were only able to speak after I had filed the story, but her expertise and compassion as a caregiver — she is a registered nurse — were as evident as her love for her mother-in-law. I suppose that underlines the basic message of the Fontanas’ story, and of our whole package: Aging in place is a family effort. If you find our coverage useful to your own family, we’ll consider it a job well done. We independently review everything we recommend. When you buy through our links, we may earn a commission. Learn more ›
When it comes to adapting your home for aging, it’s best to take a proactive approach. Once you or your loved ones are in your “forever home,” start thinking about how to transition the space — the right gear can reduce or even eliminate many of the safety risks of growing older. This visual tool walks you through everything you’ll need, from the bathroom, to the bedroom, to the stairs. Our ultimate guide to adapting a house for aging→
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