| Dear Carolyn: My daughter got married a year ago. It was an immediate-family-only affair, which is how she wanted it, since even then the guest list was over 100 people. Many of my friends did send my daughter a gift anyway — not a huge gift, but at least a nice acknowledgment and gift card, and it was so thoughtful. I’m disappointed in two very close friends who didn’t do anything and am having trouble getting over it. I have sent very generous gifts to their kids. One of the weddings we couldn’t attend and the other we did. They contributed $35 to a shower gift. I know it isn’t a tit-for-tat thing and I know the rule of thumb is that if you aren’t invited, then you aren’t required to send a gift, but — they’ve known my daughter forever. And having given their kids really nice gifts, I would have expected them to do something. What do you think? — Disappointed | 
